05 March 2012

Thinking What I Mean

How distressingly lax I've been about my blogging.  It's ironic, really, because in January I took a spiritual development class that included learning to journal well.  I've since started a paper journal and grossly neglected this electronic one. 

But that has me thinking about what I share and when.  Sometimes I think I would like one day to say the things I mull over on paper to the "world" on this blog.  I like to think that it would be a lesson in being my authentic self. 

But of course, I never would, because even when I talk to myself, I edit.

It's incredible to me how much I edit my thoughts in my own head, asking, "Should this be said?  Should this be said now?  Should this be said by me?"  And it's a help and a hindrance.  Lost chances and last minute saves come from our editing.  Tact, nuance, all these things that we run our brains over everyday, almost without thought, help us to, I think, love our neighbors. 

And as much as I would relish living "uncensored," love is more important.

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